Crystal's feeling happy and relaxed.
December 17th 2007 09:08
Flowers in the vase
I had a really nice weekend with Jim. He came over Saturday afternoon for what was going to be our 'talking' weekend.
It was pretty awkward really, fortunately Tinkerbelle is a great distractor so she was the ice breaker.
Both of us seemed somewhat tongue tied and we ended up strolling around the garden, hand in hand, both of us liking a garden but neither of us having any skills that way. I picked a bunch of flowers and took them back inside to arrange in a vase and Jim settled himself in the sunroom. When I'd finished arranging my pickings I took the vase back in with me and took them out to the sunroom to join Jim, setting the vase on a special table I used there for holding such things with the odd book or two that was generally lying around.
Jim said how much he loved that room and I asked him what his place was like.
"Pretty barren", he informed me. "But you'll see for yourself tomorrow when you come over. I don't think you're going to be too impressed." I offered to bring some flowers but he admitted he didn't have a vase.
We talked of his childhood and his mum's struggles bringing up four boys on her own.
He didn't mind admitting he did feel rather inadequate as a male as he'd had no father figure but at least his mum didn't have a string of boyfriends and he felt good about that.
Four boys together were pretty unruly and they'd more or less brought themselves up, leaving mum to do the cooking cleaning and washing, you know how it is.
But I didn't. I'd had a very conventional upbringing and our dad's presence was always felt.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, Jim's place was pretty bare and he was rather embarassed about it. I understood but wondered what our future prospects would be like, but neither of us were ready for the long term commitment as yet.
Christmas came up and as arranged already Jim is to come to our place for Christmas dinner and he'd go elsewhere for tea and whether he joined his mum or his brothers I left up to him, it really wasn't any of my business and I thought to introduce me to his mum seemed rather premature.
He seemed rather relieved, but it seems we still have a long way to go in getting to know each other. These things do take time and I felt pleased that I wasn't the type that would just hop into bed and worry about other things later, by then it was too late and girls seemed to get rather desperate trying to snare a male who had never expressed any desire in a long term relationship let alone with them.
So, having had our talk and moving a long a bit I felt much more relaxed and comfortable.
I really wanted to enjoy Christmas, especially as I'd be having a hard earned two weeks off.
By Sunday afternoon, back at my place together Jim and I started to relax more in each other's company and he said how much he was looking forward to another family day with my folks. He was not alone in that, I was too.
I'm feeling a certain relief tonight and I am going to try to worry a lot less, but Jim and I will need to continue talking before we make any plans for a future, meanwhile we enjoy each other's company and continue to feel passionate in our encounters and that is certainly very nice.
Four mouths to feed
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Comment by charliesgirl_992000
Histeries, Mysteries and what not
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Take care, Tammy
Comment by katyzzz
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Comment by tlcorbin
But, my wife has had the good sense and taste to gently foo foo up my environment with lady things. I know I'm home when I enter the door and realize her presence is literally everywhere, even the scents and sounds remind me of her presence and influence in my life. And my life has become so much richer for it.
Let Jim relax and allow yourself the same opportunity; I'd have to say Jim may be trying allow himself to be domesticated.
I'd be the sleeping nestling and wow, those flowers are nice-is this a view of your yard and deck? Very Inviting scene.
Raven
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Apologies I havent had time to check your blogs for a while, and I have just got back from my trip. It seems like everything is turning out quite well for you and I am happy to read about it!
Amy
Comment by Krystal
feelings
katyzzz, you made me laugh, yes the birds are funny, aren’t they?
Michaelie, those birds are ugly, enough to put one off a family for good, imagine so many to feed
WYS, yes things are going well, and yes the birds are ugly
Raven, you write such wonderful words, to reply would be a post in itself, thank you for you wisdom and the male point of view.
Thanks Holly, I’m sure your turn will come.
Lara, I think you said it all, although not everyone feels the same and I sense you do see things a little differently.
Louie, I hope my children are not so ugly, nor so hungry, nothing like a big family.
Good on you techno, you have a great dad,
Amy, I have missed you, I did realize you were away.
Thank you all for your comments, you are all wonderful.
Crystal